Wednesday, July 11, 2012

What the Heck Wednesday

Today, I thought I'd try a new feature here.... What the Heck Wednesday.  I got the idea from a blog I follow entitled How Not to Dress Like a Mom.  Jae, the blog writer, titles her segment Freaky Friday.  Basically, she features crazy fashion and comments on it.  I often send submissions to her, so I thought I'd try this on my own blog instead.  Let me know what you think.  Is it a keeper?

I think most women are shoe lovers to a certain degree.  So, let's start off with some really um interesting? shoes that I found online.  BTW - a word of advice:  scrap baubles lying around and a glue gun do not a shoe designer make. 

I apologize in advance if any of you own any of the shoes featured, and I gladly offer my assistance the next time you go shoe shopping..... puhleeeze let me help you. 

Here we go:

Embroidered Kitty Mary Janes - Women's size.  Seriously??  Unless you are a 2 year old little girl, you should not be wearing kitty shoes.  Lucky for those of us with cat allergies, they also come in a chihuahua design.

Okay, these shoes aren't so bad, until.......

That's right, a secret compartment built into the heel.  Now, I have to admit, it seems to be a pretty good idea.  But think about it - instead of toilet paper dragging from your shoe, imagine a tampon hanging out of your shoe??  'Nuff said.

Okay, all I can say here is Ewwww.... why??  The folks who made these shoes have all kind of freakish footwear from vampire themed to zodiac sign inspired.  This pair actually made me shudder.  They are called the Scorpio Queen, and the description touts their taxidermy skills stating those are REAL scorpions on the sides and the heels.  They will design shoes for any zodiac sign.  Wonder what they would come up with for Leo?  Again, eww...... 

Wow!  I have some beads in my Christmas ornament box. Maybe I can make my own pair of these.  Think I could get $150 for them?  No?  Moving along.....

Since I tend to sit on my feet quite often, these probably wouldn't be a good idea.  $132.00

Again with the kitty shoes??  Maybe I need to do an animal-themed shoe post one day.  I'm seeing way too many of them.  These are called Lucky Black Cat.  If you paid the $400 asking price for these things, you need more than luck.  Just sayin'.

Custom Glow In the Dark/Cosmic Nebula Shoes - I really can't believe these.  It looks like someone dug through the bottom of their closet and found the nastiest, stankiest pair of shoes they could.  They probably dripped paint on them by accident and decided to just go with it.  Hey, maybe it's the stink that makes them glow in the dark.  Okay, I just grossed myself out.

Felted Wool Shoes with Lacy Detail - $140.  The description says these are perfect for indoors or outdoors.  These look like someone ripped the lining out of a pair of shoes and are wearing the lining.
Leather platform creepers - $90.  Creepers?  I say Creepy!  These look like they belong to the bride of Frankenstein.  I think the fishnet stockings really make these.  Don't you?

What can I say about these?   OMG!  O.M.G!!  Crocs, albeit, somewhat comfortable and good for wearing while doing nasty yard work, fashionable they are not.  These Crocs?  Well... these are just hideous!  HIDEOUS!

Okay - I've had enough fun for one day.  There are so many pairs of shoddy shoes out there, I could go on for days.  Yet, I just barely scraped the surface.  Let me know what you think?  Should this be a regular?

I'd like to close with a pretty pair of shoes to help cleanse the palate, so to speak, but I think I burned my retinas with that last pair and can no longer focus properly.  Oh well....

Happy hump day ya'll!